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Q&A 123. Children falling in love at a young age

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Q: Dear Master Lu, my son is in year 12 (the last year of high school). Recently, he has been frequently texting and calling a girl, and his suspicious behaviour suggests that this is not just a normal friendship. He will not listen to me, what should I do?


  • Firstly, parents should not interfere with their children’s relationships, as each person has their own karmic affinities.
  • However, if you are concerned about your children beginning a romantic relationship at too young an age, and you are concerned that their academic performance would be affected or that they would commit wrongdoings, then as parents you should still discipline them appropriately. You can recite Buddhist scriptures and pray to Guan Yin Bodhisattva to help you to curb your children’s behaviour.
  • To help your son, you can include the following sutras and mantras in the daily recitations that you perform for him:
    • The basic recitation should include the following: The Great Compassion Mantra 3 times per day, the Heart Sutra at least 7 times per day, and the Eighty-Eight Buddhas Great Repentance twice per day.
    • You can recite the Mantra to Untie Karmic Knots 21 times per day. Note that it is best to avoid reciting this mantra excessively. It is strongly recommended that you not try to change the predestined path of your children or forcefully separate a couple.
    • You can recite the Da Ji Xiang Tian Nü Zhou 21 times per day. The Da Ji Xiang Tian Nü Zhou is for bringing good fortune and relationships. You can say the following prayer: “May the Greatly Merciful and Greatly Compassionate Guan Yin Bodhisattva protect and bless my son, <full name of your son>, so that he will have a good relationship.” A “good relationship” refers to a relationship that does not affect his academic performance or lead him down the wrong path. It could also refer to a relationship that is delayed until later in life.
    • In addition, you can recite the Cundi Dharani, and pray to Guan Yin Bodhisattva to protect and bless your child so that he will perform well in his studies.
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